Показаны сообщения с ярлыком a project. Показать все сообщения
Показаны сообщения с ярлыком a project. Показать все сообщения

четверг, 8 сентября 2011 г.

my spring

В процессе моей учебы 4-х месячного курса "Фотография на пределе" у куратора Нади Шереметовой вышел вот такой проект.



My spring
When on our body there is a scar from any wound, it reminds us about happened with our body. As also the photo has ability to return us to the last event. Sometimes we don't want to remember something. But at times it is necessary for us not to forget.
    On my body too there is a scar with a reminder on operation concerning the extra-uterine pregnancy which has happened in 2009.
    I have started to remove the fourth pregnancy from the moment when has seen on the test two strips. I was captured at once by anxiety, whether all is normal. It was terrible. Doctors have assured: "If you try to become pregnant independently, at you again will be extra-uterine". But all has managed, the fruit has appeared in a uterus. Only the anxiety hasn't passed. To extra-uterine on term of 7 weeks my second child has stood in me. It seemed to me, it is necessary to reach at least three months that will calm down and to trust in safely mature pregnancy. I have asked the doctor that me have put on preservation. Lie down  in the hospital 10 days, in 2 days after an extract at me problems have begun. Me have again put in hospital.
So, through all barriers, we made the way to life.
In 3 weeks the child should be born, I live so far  from the signal to a signal, pausin in the expectations of pertubation in me.

Speak, overcoming fear, we become stronger. But there are moments in our life when on you depends nothing. And only belief in tomorrow's "is good" can though somehow to support you and to give hope.
Photographing itself throughout all pregnancy, I as if insured myself from failure. Stopping experiences in a shot, on the one hand, I as though destroyed them, got rid of internal pressure, on the other hand, thereby didn't dare to forget this hard way to the old desire.

My fourth pregnancy has had on an early autumn, all the winter long, all the spring long.


My spring


Комментарии:

понедельник, 15 ноября 2010 г.

On the trail childhood

(in progress) Seldom, when there is one house on all life. But there is a house where you were born, there is a house where you have spent the childhood, and there is a house in which you live now. Also can eat still houses in which you will live still.
In this house I was born, and a vein of 19 years . Therefore, when I am going to go to mum, I speak: «I have gone home». Earlier when the daddy was live, coming here, I as if was dipped again into the childhood therefore as it is not enough that varied in apartment: the same old furniture on the places, the same carpet on a wall, hours, the TV. The daddy loved a constancy in everything, therefore without changing itself just as daily at dinner or a supper, he ate garlic, an interior of apartment it did not change.
Now much has changed, from appearance of apartment to other man in our house.
I descended to the grandmother, to mum of the father, my childhood also is connected with their house.
I have returned here to embody the rests of my childhood, the slice of memoirs on the father because I know that soon and it will leave irrevocably.

Part 1 - my house 





















Part 2 - Grandma's House























среда, 15 сентября 2010 г.

About children and adults who are always "children"

The Magansky psychoneurological boarding school is intended for constant residing of the seriously ill people, suffering by the chronic mental diseases, needing a permanent care, consumer services, sociolabor rehabilitation.
In 2005 the Magansky children's house-boarding school for mentally retarded children is reorientated in a psychoneurological boarding school for adults.

From myself I will add, there was I there once, but hope that else I will arrive. Besides has promised photos to bring him. I Want to print and bring. It is not enough once for вникания in an essence of a problem or has simply put. I went there with the priest who took them under guardianship, comes to christen newcomers of patients and serves the Liturgy of times in a month. The service passes in the allocated room for prayers, have established there an altar.

Communion

Girl looks out the window
Play







I as though was ready to see them, in me any clod of resistance and hardness simultaneously accrued. There was any mute pain, not daring to escape outside.

Whom to blame? There was no one to blame, and did not want to do. Thoughts raced one by one: "And if you were mother of one of such children?", "Someone for certain thinks: what for was to give birth to them on torments?"

But they the kindest and likely the most correct in this life. They are able to rejoice. And to love!


Addressing to the priest:
- The father, I wanted to ask you to pray for my mum.
- What is her name?
- Zynaida (names a patronymic)
- She live at you?
- She reception my mum, she is medical orderly here. We have made friends with her.

пятница, 9 июля 2010 г.

Период болезни и всякие мелочи


Таблетки и градусник// Tablets and a thermometer


Муж держит в руках мой рентген. На снимке пневмония// The husbhe husband has control over my X-ray. The X-ray shows a pneumonia





Давид рассматривает папин мяч// David considers a daddy's ball.


Сын в ванной. The son in a bathroom.

воскресенье, 9 мая 2010 г.

Behind closed doors

Continuation...







Я не могу без общения. Телефон часто в моих руках. Муж ревнует/ I cannot without dialogue. Phone often in my hands. The husband is jealous.



Муж пришел с работы с пивом/ The husband has come from work. Has brought beer.


Муж и сын в отцовской шапке смотрят в окно/ The husband and the son in a daddy's cap look out of the window


Я/ I


Сын встречает папу с работы/ The son meets the daddy from work





Отец и сын/ The father and the his son





Поделка сына. Ангелы на Пасху/ Hand-made article of the son. Angela for Easter


Свеча горит у икон/ The candle burns at icons

четверг, 6 мая 2010 г.

Behind closed doors

За закрытыми дверями…
История нашей семьи началась 6 лет назад, или немного раньше. Мы решили пожениться, когда узнали, что у нас будет ребенок. Тогда никто из нас не задумывался о тех трудностях, которые могли возникнуть у семьи, основанной не на любви. Когда они появились, легче всего было принять решение о разводе. Останавливает вера в Бога.
Святые отцы говорят, о том, что семья - это школа для нас несовершенных, где нужно научиться любить хотя бы одного ближнего человека - своего супруга или супругу. Возможно, мы только сейчас начинаем учиться любить друг друга. И это оказалось намного сложнее, чем быть просто рядом, и жить своими интересами. Почти провально сложно.

(Когда мы венчались, муж был неверующим, но спустя пару лет, он по собственному желанию пришел в церковь. Сейчас, после всех трудностей, что мы испытали и до сих пор испытываем, он снова вернулся к своему прежнему состоянию, состоянию сомнений в вере, в церковь он больше не ходит.)

The history of our family has begun 6 years ago, or a bit earlier. We have decided to get married, when have learned that we will have a child. Then anybody from us didn't reflect on those difficulties which could arise at a family based not on love. When they have appeared, it was most easier to make the decision on divorce. The belief in God stops.
Sacred fathers say, that the family is a school for us imperfect where it is necessary to learn to love at least one near person - the spouse or the spouse. Probably, we just now start to learn to love each other. And it has appeared much more difficult, than to be simple nearby, and to live the interests. Almost botched it is difficult.

(When we got married, the husband was the non-believer, but after couple of years, it has at own will come to church. Now, after all difficulties that we have tested and till now we test, it has again returned to the former condition, a condition of doubts in belief, in church it doesn't go any more.)






Венчание. 11 февраля/ Wedding ceremony. On February, 11th


Untitled


Игры нашего ребенка. «Гусеница»/ Games of our child. "Caterpillar"


Пробоина. В ярости запустил кружку в стену/ Hole. In fury has started a mug in a wall





Тени в комнате сына. Я не люблю ночью спать/ Shades in a room of the son. I do not like to sleep at night


Боль… Тяжело находиться в гармонии с собой, желая уйти из семьи, но понимая, легче от этого никому не будет/ Pain … it is heavy to be in harmony with itself, wishing to leave a family, but understanding, it will be easier from it to nobody


Начали ремонт в комнате сына. Но мы не знаем, что нас ждет завтра?/ Have begun repair in a room of the son. But we do not know, what for us waits tomorrow?


«Красный угол»/ Icon Corner



Игры нашего ребенка. «Крушение поезда»/ Games of our child. «Train wreck»


Мне нужно выдумать тебя из кучи пепла и огня,
Из необдуманных ошибок подсознания,
Когда уже назначено свиданье
Мной не любимому, чужому «я»…
(Отрывок из стихотворения мужа «Пепел»)/
I need to invent you from a heap of ashes and fire,
From rash errors of subconsciousness,
When appointment is already appointed
Me to not favourite stranger "I" …
(A fragment from a poem of the husband "Ashes")



Без веры…/ Without belief



Сын купается/ The son bathes



Глазами ребенка…/ Eyes of the child


11 февраля 2010 года нашей семье исполнилось 6 лет. Муж подарил цветы./ On February, 11th, 2010 to our family 6 years were executed. The husband has presented flowers.